It All Makes Sense

Fact:
Smoking bans are going up all over the country. Approximately 50% of all Americans are in some way affected by a state-mandated limitation on where they can smoke tobacco products. The trend isn't new, but the scale is growing exponentially. Just ask my roommate.

Charlie (right)

NY city has one, California (the state, mind you) has one, Seattle has one, Pittsburgh has one. These bans affect bars, restaurants, and any enclosed public areas primarily in cities.

Sure seems excessive. Sure seems like somethings up. Someone is whisking the smoke out of the steel and stone pillars of man's accomplishment faster than bees out of North American Hives.

Wait a Minute.

Clarity

Who hates smoke more than anyone?


Bees.

They're disappearing from their hives across NA, and now across Europe. No one knows why. See wikipedia.org/Colony_Collapse_Disorder or something.

But no one can find the bodies.

And now it's pretty fucking obvious what they're up to. They're tired of the country and its laid-back pace. They've been behind the smoking bans, because they need a place to live. They're meeting somewhere (Underground? I don't know.) until our bars are crisp and clean and smoke free. And then it'll be time.


Time for the Urban Swarm

Details to follow.